The Big Sister

Experiencing pregnancy with Clara has been fun. She is very excited to have a new baby and is thrilled to be an older sister. Although the older siblings can never be prepared for or fully comprehend the changes that are about to take place, I try to explain to her some things that will be different. Clara's responses are always very sweet and thoughtful. Although they aren't always realistic, it still makes me smile. She's told me she will change the baby's diaper, hold the baby if she cries and stir dinner so it doesn't burn if the baby needs me while I'm making dinner and of course, if the baby cries in her crib, she'll go put her back to sleep or play with her.

She always comes up with different names for the baby as well. From Pocahontas to Lisa to Katie. Or the other day it was Hide-n-Seek, but Heidi for short. She talks and sings to the baby through my stomach. When I take pictures of my pregnant self, she loves to sneak into them. She pats and rubs my belly and giggles when she feels the baby move. For a few weeks she was obsessed with the fact that the baby ate whatever I ate. Every time I'd eat something she'd ask if the baby was eating it too. She's also been very curious about what the baby is doing in my stomach, like eating, sleeping, breathing, pooping, etc. etc. Her inquisitive mind gets me thinking too. Isn't amazing that babies get the exact amount of nutrients they need from us so there is no need for them to poop until they are ready to come out?

Occasionally Clara will randomly say, "I want the baby to come out so bad!" or "I want the baby to come out now!" I see I'm not the only one getting impatient. Obviously there will be an adjustment period, but I think Clara is going to love having a baby sister. I know she'll be a good big sister and be a big helper. She loves to help me and I think as long as she's involved in what's going on with the baby, she won't mind the attention the baby demands. I'm so glad for the four years I have had to spend with her, but I think we're both ready to switch up our family dynamics.
Things I should be doing instead of blogging: making dinner for the neighbors, working on my mom's Christmas card, cleaning my house for Clara's party, taking a shower, getting ready for Clara's party tomorrow (I only have to bake the cake, make about 20 graham cracker houses and prepare dinner for 40, ha ha ha) and finishing up things for the baby. But no, I sit on the couch and blog so my chubby little ankles will get some relief.

On Due Dates - As If You Care

I pretty much over analyze everything. Due dates are no exception, especially with this one.

With Clara, according to my cycle (and no, I'm not referring to a unicycle, Ryan), I was due December 15th. In my 8 week ultra sound, the fetal measurements indicated a December 22nd due date. We kept it at the 15th, Clara was born on the 21st and I was 6 days late. Or was I really 1 day early?

With this one, according to my cycle, I was due December 15th. (What are the chances... let's not analyze that piece too much). In my 8 week ultra sound, the fetal measurements indicated a December 25th due date. My doctor said if that due date is more than 10 days different than the counting method, they typically move the date, hence my 25th due date. If I hadn't had that ultrasound, I'd have the 15th as my due date and I probably would have been induced this upcoming week.

Instead, I have an induction scheduled on the 28th. According to my due date, that's only 3 days over due and it's giving me anxiety. Yet again, had I not had an ultrasound at that first appointment, it would appear to be a medically necessary induction and not a I-need-to-have-this-baby-by-the-end-of-the-year induction (tax credit, additional dependent, deductible doubles in 2011, see the need?). It makes me skeptical when I hear people being a week early or 2 weeks late.

I think this all boils down to my anxiety about being induced being only a few days over due. I know some people have had great experiences, and even prefer it that way, but I kind of like to let nature take its course. I don't want to be induced and we scheduled it just in case. At my appointment next week, my doctor said we'd reassess to decide if being induced only 3 days after my due date will create any sort of risk of complication. If so, we'll cancel the induction and wait it out. Having the baby in 2011 will cost us several thousand more than in 2010, but I'd rather be healthy and have a healthy delivery.

Of course I'm hoping we never even make it to the 28th... Clara said she hopes the baby is born on her birthday. I told her to pray for it. Ha.

Here you go, 39 weeks, 1 day and plenty blurry (not wearing anything over my belly other than my tank top makes it look nice and plump). Dressed in our Christmas colors, we attempted family pictures today before church. The lighting was bad, the timing was bad and trying to teach an almost four year old to smile seems impossible. So we tried for after church.

Take 1 Whoops, forgot to set the timer.

Take 2Still bad lighting, still haven't figured out how to explain to Clara how to smile and still wishing I had a better camera and a personal photographer to follow me around.

Better luck next time...

Baby, It's Cold Outside

Okay, it's not really that cold. But a rainy 60* compared to a sunny 80* feels cold here in Arizona. We took advantage of our wintry weather and had a morning of hot chocolate and ice skating* (think socks+tile). Nevermind that I was in a t-shirt and shorts...Then, since it also happened to be Clara's wedding day, she danced a little more and twirled all around. I asked her how she was getting married since she's too little to get married and she said, "Mom, my husband is just a baby husband." Awesome.

*This was Clara's idea. She told me I needed to get some socks on so we could ice skate. Just before we started, I got a phone call and Clara whispered to me: Hurry, the ice is breaking.

Am I Missing Something?

The more people offer to help once this baby is born, the more I worry that I am missing something. Is having a newborn harder than I remember?

With Clara, it was a breeze. Seriously. I got way more sleep than I did before she was born, I didn't have to wake up to an alarm clock each morning and get to work by a certain time, lots of people brought us food, my mom was my own personal maid for a week or more and my recovery was great. Having to adjust my routine for only one kid was a cinch. It wasn't like I took naps either. I know #2 will be a little trickier since I have the added dynamic of having Clara, but is it going to be that much harder?

I might be in denial, but my conclusion is this: for me, it all comes down to the role my excitement plays. It kind of overshadows all the dreaded parts of newborns. With Clara, I was so excited to be a mom. I was so excited not to be working. I was so excited to have my very own baby. I was so excited to start that phase of my life. With this one, I waited and wanted for a long time. Now that I am getting my wish, I am equally excited. I guess thoughts of the inevitable lack of sleep, the recovery, the diapering, the nursing, etc. is lost amongst that excitement, yet again.

For those of you wondering... my body hasn't changed a bit since last week. Shucks.

Party Time

We had a weekend of parties.

Friday night: Ward Christmas party
Favorite part: singing The Twelve Days of Christmas, each table responsible for one of the days Least favorite part: panicking that there wouldn't be enough food, doubling my recipe and having more leftovers than we could ever eat (anyone want to come over for dinner?)


Saturday afternoon: birthday party
Favorite part: launching off bottle rockets and watching Clara's reaction (probably the coolest idea for a 3 year old birthday party)
Least favorite part: showing up late and having to leave early

Saturday evening: Jason's family party
Favorite part: having it at our hoouse (and being able to visit with the adults in one room while the kids played and watched a movie in the other room)
Least favorite part: not taking a single picture until after everyone had left

Being on my feet for basically two days straight and eating too much salt has left me with sore, swollen ankles. If only I didn't have things going on every day of this upcoming week, I'd have hope that maybe the swelling would reside before the baby comes.

Baby Preparations

Instead of looking at all the things I'd like to get done before this baby is born, I decided to focus on things that I felt needed to get done prior to that time, whenever it may be. Since I take the word need very seriously, I found that only one item on my list was a need: wash the carseat. You kind of need a carseat to bring the baby home and we kind of want to take the baby home after she's born. So, I have washed the carseat and now feel ready for the baby. Everything else can wait.

While I wait, I have been able to get other things ready, if only a little at a time. I got all the clothes washed (half of them had awful yellow stains from spit up that came out nicely after a day long soak in a tub full of OxyClean), I washed the swing, I registered online for the hospital and today my mom and I primered that nasty red wall in the nursery.

Apparently, I'll have plenty of time to get everything else done too. My 37.5 week self is not dilated, which was no surprise considering I still hadn't dilated on my due date with Clara. On a happy note, I've still been able to keep my swelling way down. More often than not, my ankles are swollen at night and my legs are like camels, storing plenty of water. However, it's nothing compared to what I experienced with Clara and much of it is gone in the morning.

36 weeks... gotta love how black makes things appear smaller than they are!

I've also adopted a new philosophy that has helped me plan and make arrangements for this unknown deadline I'm anxiously waiting for. I assume the baby will be born early when I'm considering things I would like to get done before then (painting, crib bedding, etc.), but assume the baby will be born a few days late when making holiday plans (train parks, temple lights, Clara's birthday party, etc.). I figure some sort of plan, even if it never happens, is better than no plan at all!

Speed Blogging - The Symphony

I went to The Phoenix Symphony with Karen and her friend Keith. I'll be honest, it was hard for me to want to go sit for 2 hours with my 36 week pregnant self. I figured at least the company would be good so I went and I enjoyed the symphony more than I thought. It helped that we had the Loge seats, so I could put my legs up, move my chair around, take my shoes off, tip my chair back and get comfortable. The performance was relaxing and the pianist was incredible. I am glad I went. I do wonder, however, how so many people are willing to pay so much to go to the symphony. I guess I'm just not as cultured as I thought...

Speed Blogging - Thanksgiving

This year we had Thanksgiving with my family on Thanksgiving. Normally my mom likes to do it on Wednesday night, so it was a little different. We had 16 people there, which is small since our frequent Sunday night dinners include 21 people. My only wish for a better day was that my stomach had more room to expand because I didn't eat nearly enough. The weather was beautiful, the cousins played and I did a little shopping. Sometimes when our lives are so richly blessed, it becomes easier to focus on what we don't have instead of what we do have. I've been trying to focuse more on all that I have to be grateful for rather than wish for things I don't. I am grateful for so many things. At the top of the list: Clara, the Holy Ghost, my mom, friends that listen and a healthy pregnancy.

The posers (that didn't know I was taking their picture)The eating

The Goose (good thing we ate turkey for dinner)

The playing

Speed Blogging - Primary Program

Clara participated in her first Primary Program. If only I could have recorded it...

Although I was called into primary, they didn't have room on the stage for me. I was glad I got to watch Clara from the audience, especially since it was her first. She hadn't got much sleep the night before, was totally grumpy all day and had a total melt down five minutes before the program started. I was worried she wouldn't do her part. But she did it and did it perfectly, just as we had rehearsed*. As if that was entertainment enough, she sang. Loud. We heard her hold onto the last note of nearly every song, loud and confident, after everyone else had cut off. At one point, she even put her lips out to accentuate an "oooh", threw her head up in the air and resembled a howling coyote so well that we couldn't help but laugh. I love my little Clara. She's confident, energetic and has such a sweet, literal perspective on life.
*When the Primary President gave me Clara's part she told me Clara's part included a little extra speaking. I told her Clara would be thrilled to talk a lot in the microphone and she said, "Yeah, that's what her teachers told me." Ha ha. All the other Sunbeams had a line to memorize. Clara's part was to tell, in her words, how she knows Jesus loves her. She said she knows Jesus loves her because he sends babies to earth (or "earf" if we're being technical), He created the earth, the sun, the moon, the stars, the trees and the animals ("aminals").

Speed Blogging - Butterflies

A few weekends ago Karen, Clara and I went to the Desert Botanical Garden to see the Butterfly exhibit. We learned how to tell the difference between the males and females so Clara enjoyed looking at the butterflies and trying to figure out which was which.However, I wasn't too impressed and am glad I only had to pay the $3.50 entrance fee to the butterfly exhibit and not the $15 entrance fee to the gardens. It definitely wasn't worth $18.50... $3.50 was pushing it. Monarch butterflies are pretty, but we have some in our backyard. Plus, we were told by the workers and found out for ourselves that monarch butterflies are not friendly, social butterflies.

On the other hand, I was fascinated with these glass plants from the Chihuly event. The colors were especially vibrant under the partly overcast sky.